Nearing.. :S

Is this taken on purpose?? :O

Christmas eve! (:

Life is quite sad for me haha. One moment i feel this and another moment i feel another way.

Well, life still has to go on. Bow down to reality hahah.

Ok i think i've gone crazy, its 2am and i feel high. Suddenly :O

I feel scared for the release of the Os results:(

If i cry on that day, must hug me ok! (applies to all who's reading this)

I can literally feel how anxious/afraid i will be feeling when i walk up to the teacher and take the slip from her,

And see the paper! Scared scared scared :S

Merry merry christmas!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!


Went west coast early in the morning ystd. Then to town and watched Alvin and the Chipmunks2.
Bought tickets for Peony and we watched the same movie in the same theatre but quite far away.
She said she's happy to see me! HAHAHA! :D
Walked and walked and home-d at 7plus.


I swear this is super gay! TTM.

Am going mia.

Best wishes for you.

Went for camp from 18-21dec. Had a fun time there :)
Sometimes i hope that the camp would never end so i'll not have to face the same problems anymore.

Everything just collapses in a day, hope happiness and so on.
Whatever it is, i will get over it. I shall not dwell on it anymore.
Life's like this isn't it/

L4d2!!!!!

L4d2 for two days~
Went to cut hair just now, i look like some cuckooooooooo now.
Ok its going 4am now, so tired!
I'm not gonna online till monday. Miss me please HAHAHA.

妈妈骑马，马慢，妈妈骂马！

C.R.Q

Meeting fernanda and amanda at illuma at 3pm tomorrow~
Gonna l4d2, yay! :)
I feel so sad now, will be so lonely this weekend :(
Anyone wanna accompany me? :'(

Someone that will fight for me and not with me.

I'll still wait.

Went to marina sqaure on sat, surprised fernanda!! Hahah.
Esplanade to slack, missed the last train. Waited for celestine's father to fetch them home.
Then cabbed home with fernanda.
Finals ystd, lost 3-1. Good match though.
Went to eat then slack. Cabbed to jurong east and train-ed home.
Been reaching home late these few days..

Gonna L4d2 on wednesday with fernanda amanda and anwar at Cineleisure. :D
Now that there's no more U19 matches, its getting s boring.
Fernanda and amanda have trainings and is going for U17 at malaysia on friday :( :( :(
Gonna be so lonely, awwww~
Sigh, will miss you both know! HAHAHA.

Looking forward.

Won 2-0. Went to eat steamboat with amanda anwar fernanda and her family.
Been so long since i've eaten.
Training later at 12pm, then home to change and to esplanade.

Hope and prays that we can get into finals :(

Put a distance between.

Match later, against yuying.
I don't feel like a normal human being. I sleep at the time when ppl wakes up.
I feel like im a walking zombie.
Slept for less than 2hours. Don't feel hungry.
I feel like crying :(

Right, im staying away from everyone. I feel so dejected..
I wished i don't have to think about it. Thinking of it makes me worse.
I want to be happy, who doesn't?

I want you by my side.
I don't only want a friend's concern from you.

Greatly affected..

Won the match today 2-0.
Its just how amazing i survived two days with just eating 3/4 hotdog without the bread and not feel hungry at all.
I had a hard time eating the hotdog ok, just cause i have to take medicine.
I don't know what the hell is wrong with me!!!!
Have not been getting enough sleep these few days, i feel so tiredddd. Both mentally and physically.

--

(23:32) chubby_shin@hotm:
haha! dont bluff! you jieqiu, saqiu, kaiqiu all very cute. den wanchew oso say! haha if gracy in singapore she will say you look lyk winnie the pooh again!
(23:33) MerabelLYS :
Hahah where will cute!!
(23:34) chubby_shin@hotm:
cute what! you see yourself lorh. next time when u play you put a mirror there
(23:34) MerabelLYS :
My expression?
(23:36) chubby_shin@hotm:
haha ya! and your actions. hehe.

YASMIN, I DON'T AGREE OK! WHATS WITH MY EXPRESSION AND MY ACTIONS?!!!!!! TSK.

--

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FERNANDA! LOVE YOU!! :)


I still have to smile and laugh to pretend that i'm ok when i'm not.
Its tough. And if i don't, ppl will ask if i'm ok. And i only can say, yes i am ok.
Cheer up, thats what everyone says. If only doing is as easy as saying.
Not that i want to make anyone be worried about me.
Where were you when i needed you th most.

Its not easy.

Life's like this isn't it?
Everyone only cares about their own feelings.
Like who fucking cares about how i feel.
I've lots of problems, who knows? Who can understand how i feel.

Amanda said, "Go for the one that'll fight for you, not the one that'll fight with you."

But i guess no one will fight for me? I wouldn't know it too.
How i wish i can go MIA.

I SUCK.

I'm sorry.

I'm so lazy to update, but im here still.
Jocelyn woke me up at 5.25am cause she has nightmare!
Because of the movie 2012!! Hahaha.
Met ruiqi at serangooooooooooooon. And went to her house.
Ps i love you + ponyo :)
HAHA YOU'RE SCARED OF TICKLE! *EVIL SMILE
And you've to stop shooting me! :(

Match tomorrow at 745pm againist huayi.


To, You.
You told me when you heard i like someone else, the feeling suck so.
Sorry but i really really don't think we will work out. I'm sorry for hurting you.
No matter what it is, im still here if you need someone to share your problems with.
I give you my word that i'll still reply.

Its getting complicated.

Lost the match today, 2-1.
But we are in the finals! If we managed to to win all other teams.
And i realised picking ball is damn fun. We keep trying to roll it on the straight line.
Super fail, but i still managed to roll afew balls! :)

Someone wake me up at 530am pleaseeeeeee. :(
I'm afraid i can't wake up. I'm damn tired.

Too torn to do anything.

I feel the pain in my heart. How i wish i was her.
If i was her, i'd never left you.
I would hold your hand and tell your mum i wanna marry you.
I'm serious.

Jealous, was that what i felt when i know about it?
I wished i know you earlier.

Close shaveee~

Training today, 3 to 5pm.
Went jurongpoint to eatttt then went for match.
Against Unity, we won 2-1. But the score is damn close.
They was leading at 13-9, it went to 14-11. And we won with the score of 17-15.
Its damn scary to play at the crucial pointsssssssss. One mistake and you will lose the match.
We was veryyyy happy when we win k, as though we're playing finals.
Jump for joy, hug everyonee~

Next monday will be playing against phs alumni. Hope for the best :)

Tell her, if you rlly like her and want her.

*You should always say how you feel, I think. Because, if there is a rejection then that is the worst case scenario and you’ll learn and grow from it. I would say go for it, you can’t always protect yourself from getting hurt and as much as it stinks it’s apart of life… I would rather get hurt going after something I want, than get hurt wishing I had.

I'm sorry i can't read minds or do stuff exactly how you want me to. Don't pout anymore and neither would i allow you to go MIA and not reply me! You're incredibly awesome and you know that right? :)

Lotz of lurf,
Rayray~

Cause its so saddening.

I think i will ignore all texts and calls from my phone. Except for my mum's call.
Cause its the best way out. Till when? I do not know.
When time comes, i will start replying again. Every single thing is stressing me out.
I don't feel happy, i'm sad. No one knows. No one can understand.
I'm blocking out everything, every single thought of you.


And yati has gone to work for someone else. :(

No one will help me to open the door when i go out and come back anymore.
No one will help me to find my things when i could not find them anymore.
No one will nag at me when i messed up my cardboard and asked me to tidy it but will do it herself.
No one will prepare my food for me anymore.
No one will ask me to not eat infront of the com anymore.
No one will talk to her bf and asked me not to tell my mother anymore.
No one will go downstairs and asked me what i want to buy anymore.
No one will help me to find my clothes and fold it nicely and put it into my bag for me anymore.
No one will ask me to wake her up when she take a nap secretly anymore.
And the list goes on and on...

I tidied the bed today for the first time of my 16years. I've to keep and fold the clothes so that my mother wouldn't have to do so much.
Even before i was born, i have a maid. I don't have to worry about anything. I don't have to do anything on my own. And i've become so dependent on maids.

Now i have to rely on my own, cause no one will be there to help me anymore.
I'll be left alone at home, no one for me to talk to. No one for me to disturb.
The emptiness suck, and i feel like crying now :'(

Cause every second with you is a bonus.

Someone is going to skudai tomorrow, i'll miss you :(
Ok i thought that Skudai was in china k! So malu hahah.
You better come back in one piece! :D

U19 training on saturday at 10am!
First match is on 1st dec.
Should i go hiatus?

I suck.

Watched 2012 today. Talked about some GROSS stuff.
Reached home around 8plus.
U19 trng on saturday in the morning :(
I'll be sooooooooo tired :(
Ok, i don't know why but i'm having fever!
I know again, but not that i want to be sick! :(
Fernanda reminded me that (tomorrow, which means today is 26th) is ___________'s birthday.
And i went, "I don't really care." Fernanda agree too! NICE ONE FERNANDA!

Short and sweet.

I'm so lazy to blog so i shall just summarise everyth.

1: We got 3rd for alumni cup. No, no prize.
2: I wasn't allowed to join outside team. Have to join volleysports.
3: Life is boring, i got nothing to do.
4: Who want to recommend job to me! :(
5: U19 is from 1st dec to 15th dec. At jurong west sports hall.

Spaces between fingers, who will be the one to fill them.

If nothing is impossible, what about you and me.

Ystd was tiring. Went to queenstown sec for a little bit of training and friendly.
Then went to haising cat to play, kinda fun but tiring.
Ate breakfast+lunch+dinner at whitesands.
Went home around 6 and reached home at 7plus.

Stayed at home the whole day today to restore my energy :P
There's alumni cup tomorrow, WE CAN DO IT EVEN WITHOUT YOUR SETTING!
We don't have to rely on your setting. Aww so sad.

Its just how amazing i keep checking my contacts list to see if you're online, which i know you wouldn't be. It has became a habit for me.

If i could tell you.

Went fernanda's house to stay over. Jocelyn too.
Cards, drink, and tv. Slept around 4plus. And got woken up at 8+!
Was feeling really tired but no, no sleeping anymore. :(
Jocelyn went to switch on th tv, the curtains, and the light!
Fernanda and i was "lai chuang-ing" for very long. Jocelyn went at 11am.
And then. Breakfast, tv, computer, sleep, tv, dinner, drink, tv.
Left her house around 11pm and reached home after 45mins. :)

Its 4.20am now, and i'm very tired but not sleeping still.
I've been having fever for idk how many days already, and its not recovering :(
I'm gonna stay home later, and face this com the whole day.

The mind controls the head.

I'm back from the chalet! I'm so tired right now :(
We cycled all the way from east coast to changi village and then to downtown east.
Spent a total of 7hours riding, butt super pain!
It was fun and yet tiring, plus i had alumni trng in the morning!
Rode under the rain, and i'm having fever since idk when :(

Left the chalet around 6plus and reached pasir ris 7am.
I felt like a 'lost bird' walking to and fro without knowing whats the unit.
Waited for Carolyn and we cabbed to jurong west sports complex.
Watched match and went to jurong point to eat. Went to slack and play ball.
And went back to jp to meet veronica. Kavis and wanjing came along too.
We talked and talked for idk how long. And talked some things out.
Went home around 8plus.

Graduation day tomorrow :(
And its 10am in the morning, kill me man.
Might be ton-ing at fernanda's house tomorrow! :)


The truth have been revealed.
Why is everyone so affected about it.
Now we all know what kind of person she is.
Its so saddening to have such a friend.

If words mean anything..

Will not be posting till i come back from chalet.
And i'll lock my blog after that, if i remember :)

Over.

Long time since i updated.
Have been suffering for severe tummyache for the past two days.
And am better now! :)

Alumni training on saturday morning and off to CHALET at east coast.
Who wanna volunteer to ton outside with me on monday? :)
Or should i go to the 'M' party? I don't know.
Might be going for some sort of training/match(?) at queenstown next thurs.
(Fyi: Outside team haha.)

Reaching the end.

Chinese tomorrow, wish me luck everyone! Hahaha.
Hopefully can get A2, i'm fine with B3 though :)

There's blood in my phlegm, make my throat damn pain :(
K, i'm going to sleep already. Or else i'll be dozing off during my paper tomorrow.
HAHA.
Goodnight yo! :D

All the memories are filled of perfect tattered pain.

I'm alone at home :(
There's no food to eat, hungry :(

Chinese papers on tuesday, and i've not revised anything at all! I'm so dead.
I'm already in hoilday mood since long long ago :/
I think i'll get a b3 again :(
Science mcq on wednesday and it marks the end of Os!!!!!! :D:D:D:D
Its so dumb, go to school at 2pm just for an hour! Waste of time.


I might forget your actions, your laughter, your smile,
The way you look at me, the days spent together, but i'll never forget, that i loved you.

Alone.

Sick, again. Sigh :(
I played texas poker every single day, and its boring me.
Life is so meaningless. I've so much problems, but who can i tell?
Its killing me. I'm breaking down.
It really suck living in this world.
If the world is going to end, i'll be first to die instead of the last.
Living in this world is causing me too much suffering.

Ps : Blog going on private.
Tag with email to be invited.
By next week.

Training.

Went for training today.
Do fitness with them, can die :(
Super GEK!!!!! Hahah.
Run too, drop dk how many hundred of balls.
I bet i'll wake up tomorrow with muscle ache everywhere.
Dk if i should go play l4d tomorrow night with fernanda and others.

Hi sweetheart.

Going for trng tomorrow 8.30-5.30.
Gonna meet them for breakfast at 7am.
I doubt i'll be able to wake up in time. Its going to 2am now :(

A leopard will never change its spots.

Bitch, don't spout nonsense la. -.-
Only your DEAR girl will listen to you k. Fucking pissed off.
Lying is your forte, fucking hypocrite. If you're such a good actor (oh sorry actress), then go join mediacorp la.
Oh wrong again, go to other country la. S.U.C.K.E.R.
I dare you to not come back to singapore anymore. You're such a loser.
I bet you will give an excuse AGAIN. (Emphasis on the AGAIN).
Fucking disgusted by you. Who's the one tolerating who.
What are you best at. Backstabbing people? Act pitiful? Flirt girls?
Aww, i feel so sorry for you. Go ahead and complain to those who believe you.
I wonder why is there such a person like you in this wold. You shame vb, shame yourself!
Other people don't know you, but we know! Know exactly what kind of person you are.

Dead.

Ss is a killer, chem is (idk what to say).
Anyway i didn't do the section C for chem at all. 20marks gone lol.
I did the paper for less than 10mins. How pro.

History and dnt tomorrow, i'm so dead.
Have not memorise anyth yet and have not study dnt.
Confirm F9 for science and ch.

And i most probably will retain, sigh :(

Burn and die.

I've not successfully memorise anyth yet for social studies tomorrow :(
Have to reach school by 745 :(
And worst is, second paper is at 2pm!! Total waste of time.
I'm so gonna fail ch :(

I think i'll wake up in the morning to study sigh.
Hopefully i'll be able to memorise.

Good luck everyone!
3 days, 5papers to go.

Im free now and it pains my heart.

Photos from 30th oct 2009 :

This and those 8photos below was taken through burst shots, I DIDN'T KNOW CAN!

Thanks to THAT PERSON who tell me, "No, they're seeing pictures."

Alot more photos, but im just too lazy to upload. For more, go to facebook and search for me :)

Fernanda's and my phone! :)

-----------

Fill my heart, remove the scar. Its empty now.

Every msge i get, i hope its from you. How pathetic does that make me?

I'd give anyth for you. It'd been a long time, but no i can't, not that idw to.

What can i do, please tell me..

Birthday wsh.

Ok i just finish replying all the wall post on my facebook.
And im surprise there're 18ppl who wished me on fb, haha :)

Ok, on th 28th.
More than 30 people text and wished me happy birthday, not many i know.
But still, thanks! Those are who i love, close friends, friends and some who rarely talk.
Maths paper 2 was quite difficult but do-able. Haha.
Waited for my mum to come and fetch me and we went to D-farm to eat.
Went home after that.
I know, what a boring birthday. But yeah, life suck.

Ok so today,
My internet connection is finally here.
Fernanda sha clarrissa jocelyn jane came over to my house downstairs to celebrate my birthday.
We went over to orchard, wanting to watch movie but in the end, no.
And they dressed like some kuku HAHA. Not me, cause i went home to change hahaha.
Though its not a great great great birthday celebration due to some minor minor things.
But still, love all of you! :D

So far, Os is not so bad. I'm afraid that i would fail my english.
But for maths, i think i can at least get a C5.

Afraid..:(

As you all can see, the post below is definitely not posted by me. :) I'm at mac since afternoon and i'm still here(duh). Coming over tomorrow again to study overnight. Os is in 3days time, and i'm scared:( There's maths paper2 on my birthday, which is on wed. And i can't enjoy it:(
K, i should go back to study now :)

i find mindy very cute. :) kekekekekekekekekekekkekekeke.

A hole in my heart.

Its nearer and nearer to Os, i'm really really afraid sigh.
Anyway moving in to my new house on sat. Its nice but its small, very very small.
May have a house warming party later on.
I wanted the house warming party on my birthday. But no, cannot :(
It may be on th 24 or 25. :(

12days to Os.
14days to bday.

Manipulated.

16 more days to Os, i'm scared :(
Sigh stress..

If only i'm that fortunate,

Didn't went to school ystd and today.
Someone make me study please :(
Anyway, moving into my new house maybe next week.
Have to switch mrt and lrt :( Troublesome.
I would rather take the train all the way from khatib like now.
I went to ikea the other day to choose my study table :)
And ikea is real cold.

18 days to Os :(
20 days to my birthday :)

One step at a time.

Didn't went to school today.
Prelim2 results suckkkkkked.
I don't know how am i gonna get to poly.

I have to get at least an B4 for both english and maths,
A2 for chinese, if can. And at least a c6 for dnt.
And i can still afford F9 for either science or combine humans to get 26points.
Thats what my course needs :)

I gotten two F9s, science and ch.
Anyway i'm happy that i passed ss sbq, but i only gotten 4 over 25 for ss essay.
Lol.

25 more days to Os. :(
And 27 more days to my birthday! And i can officially watch nc16 movies :D
And its maths paper2 on my brithday :(:(
Stresssssssssssssssssssssssss...

Died.

Passed chinese, maths and english.
Chinese is still B3 :( Wonder why i retake chinese for.
Maths and english both c6.
F9 for science, confirm. Expected tho. Science is so not cool!
Taking back ss and history tomorrow, doubt will get any higher than science.

27 more days to Os.
I'm afraid :(

Everything is out now.

Got back prelim2 results.
Chinese deproved, p2 48/70. Its 68% only :( Paper1 would pull it even lower.
Failed physics, expected. P2 21/65. Mcq 8/20. (Not bad alrdy k, first time so high.)
Passed my maths paper1, totally unexpected. 49/80 :D:D:D

Gonna take back other soon.
See ya.

At the bottom of th pit.

I'm at westmall mac with zahria and fernanda! The connectio here suck big time! Wi Fi is so lag!! Anyway, got back english for prelim2 and i passed! Unexpected k! Got 19 over 30 for both essay and speech for paper1. 20 over 50 for paper. Overall 51.6. Lousy i know. Got back chem mcq, 6 over 20. Got improvement k! The last time was 1 over 20. 4 over 15 for chem practical. Chem suck :(
Hopefully will get back physics chinese and ss tmrw. Think will only pass chinese.

I wonder if i wasn't overprotective and so jealous, will things still happen? Would things be like this now?
Whats up with the ppl with the name starting of *?

Save me from this crazy world.

Tired.
Really very tired.
Someone pull me back up.
I'll be thankful.

What hurts the most.

Hi people, it have been 9hours. But we are still at mac!! We had our breakfast and lunch, inclusive of our dinner. Fattening!!!!! Hahahah.

Tuesday will be mt paper and wed is science practical, and it marks the end of prelim2.
I missed dnt paper ystd cause i'm sick:(
Down with fever, sorethroat and flu.

Going home soon, see ya! :D

Truth revealed

yo people! im with amanda and fernanda at yuhua mac now. and i love them alot! but i love AMANDA more hehe!! ^.^ <(fernanda think she cute) hahahahahah.

i found out the truth about some stuff awhile ago and im like...utterly disappointed.

okay, goodbye!;)

I want to know.

Prelim2 :(
8 papers done, 5more to go :(
I doubt i will pass any, sigh.

One paper in the morning at 8 and another at 2pm is killing me.
Exhausted :(
Maths p2 is killer paper, so say bye.

Dnt paper tomorrow and phy/chem p1 on friday.
Why can't they just put it tgt, only have to go to school for one hour on monday.
Waste of time.

Shower me with love.

Tomorrow's the deadline for dnt. Cheers!
Finally, i was so stressed up that my dream was all about dnt :(
I'm gonna have a good sleep after that!

No time to blog so much now, have to rush my dnt.


-Ciao. Till the next update :)

Mend my heart.

Stressed up doing dnt.
The deadline's in 2days time.
Lots of thing not done yet. :(

Have not studied for ss test tomorrow.
Have not done english paper2 due tomorrow.
:(:(:(

Light up my life.

English oral was rather ok. At least i talked abit.
Took back chinese Os results, gotten a B3.
Its not good at all :(
Should i retake? I don't know.

Didn't went to school today.
Not feeling well :(

A love so deep.

English Os oral tomorrow, scared x1 :(
Taking back of chinese Os results on wed , scared x2 :(

Chiong-ing dnt for these few days. Maybe till this week or next.
Very tiring, but only myself to blame.

Spent i think 2hours or more drawing working drawing?
Very troublesome plus frustrating.

Jieyi says she don't bother reading my blog cause its too boring :(
YOU HURT ME HEART!! :(:(:(
Hahaha.

If its time.

Today marks the end of prelim1, yay :)
Tomorrow will be doom day, cause its taking back of papers.
Friday will be celebrating national's day and will be playing captain's ball with teachers.
And there's no school next monday!!! :D:D:D:D

Away from everything.

Interview tomorrow :(
Science papers tomorrow as well.
Yay, because its the last day of prelim1.
Boo, because will be taking back papers :(

Pain! :(

Nail broke, blood! :(
Anyway tomorrow is the second last day of prelims.
YAY.
Paper till 9.45am. Going home after that i think.

Btw, heard from adeline that we're gonna vs teachers for captain's ball interclass.
Cause we won the other time :)

Without you, life is worthless.

Can't believe i actually got selected for interview for the dpa exercise.
When i didn't write anyth for the reason why i chose that course.
Anyway, i doubt i'll get in cause i wouldn't talk :)

Watched the Public Enemies ystd, its an NC16 movie.
The Hangover is definitely much much nicer.
Everyone should go and watch it man!

Why is that so..

Why am i always at fault.
When i didn't do anything wrong?
Why do i feel this way.
I'm not ok at all.
I'm not happy.

Maths paper1 and ss today is 99.9% fail.
Chem tomorrow and its 100000% fail.
Chem paper end at 9 tomorrow, which means can go home after that.
Like a waste of time going to school just to do a paper and go home.
Can't they set it on another day?

I'm feeling very crapy :(

Can we go back.

Today marks the start of prelim1.
English paper 1 and 2 is killer :(
I'm gonna fail english :(:(
Maths paper1 and ss tomorrow :(
Die die die :(

Tell me why.

Went to counselling and then Central to buy my mummy's birthday present.
And took a very long time to get to boat quay.
Took cab in the end though :/
Ate at sizzling rock and looked at the fireworks.
This year's fireworks is damn nice! :D:D:D:D
There was parachute and helicopter hanging singapore flag somewhere near evening too :)
Ate till 8plus and then went upstairs for karaoke.
Went off around 9plus. Went to plaza sing to catch 11.50pm movie.
The hangover :) Its NC16, and its very nice. 5 stars k!
Ended around 1plus going 2 and then took the nightrider home.
Reached home around 3++am.

The time now is 4.48am, and i have not bathe.
Intended to go www tomorrow (later), but i guess it would be postponed to next week! :)
Too tired :(

Mean the world to me.

Listening compre today, got 2 questions wrong :(
History test today, i didn't study anyth at all. Not even a tiny bit :(
From ystd onwards, i have tuition :(
Dk how long since i had tuition..
Every tuesday friday and sat. Worst thing is, sat is at 930am..

Ss test tomorrow, after school.
Friday gonna go tpy to take pay. And then study??

To presevere.

I conclude that i'm lackadaisical.
Don't know the meaning? Go check the dictionary (:

My stomach is in pain now. Idk why :(
El compre test tomorrow.
I'll go to school k! JIEYI, YOU WAIT AND SEE!
I will surely go to school no matter how sick i am!!

I spent more than one hour to finish checking all the words :(
I'm so tired.

Over the weekend, went t watch harry potter.
And escape. Intended to go www, last minute decision t go escape.
Its ok, going to www this weekend, most likely. :)

Sigh.

Did maths mock exam ystd, and realised Olevels maths is quite easy!
Easier than those papers that we normally do :)

Its 11more days to Prelim1.
26th October, the proper start of Olevels.
And maths paper2 is on my birthday :(:(:(

4tests every week, my brain isn't that big to memorise all those notes :(

Tough.

Didn't go to school today, again.
Currently studying for history test on thursday.
I chiong-ed my english ystd for nothing -.-

Should i private my blog?
Yes/No.
Majority wins. Votes by tagging :)

Private.

Supposed to go night cycling at east coast.
Last minute smth happen, so have to go down to paya lebar.
After that took bus to toa payoh and stone?
Took NR1 back and reached home at 2am?
Played monopoly and slept at 6am.
Woke up at 2.30pm today.

School tomorrow :(

PS : Blog going on private by this coming week. Email to add.
Msn/text/tag :)

Silently in love.

Why is my temperature always so high :(
I spent 30mins in the 'isolation' room because my temperature was 37.6 :(
Have to see a doctor again soon.

Chinese oral today was shit?
Kept err err.. the teacher :(
Asked me a quetion, i answered a sentence.
Sigh :(

I wished i could turn away from all the things.

Didn't go to school today, and is going to consult a doctor later :(
I'm freezing :(

I'm leading a happy life now, i think.
But why do memories keep coming back?
Why do i feel jealous, why do i still miss..
Why am i wondering how you've been, if you're happy or not.
Why do i want to see you so much?
Why is love so torturing :(

Get to know yourself better.

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you meet that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Why is it so difficult..

This week has been hectic for me :(
I'm so tired, lack of sleep.
Its only a week..
Physcis tomorrow @10am, sigh. Early early.
Then east to study.

I've to spend time to think about some things.
I seriously don't know..

& I may be privating my blog :)

Horoscope :
Romance, extravagance, and nothing but the best -- especially when it comes to seducing a certain someone like they've never been seduced before. That's your mission, and no one needs to ask you if you're willing to accept it. You've been carrying on this behind-the-scenes infatuation for far too long, anyway. It's time to get this show on the road.

Promise.

I'm not supposed to online during weekdays, but i'm online.
But i did studied, and its good k.
I don't know how long it will last.
Its only the 2nd day, and i'm feeling so tired..
I feel as though i'm gonna die :(

My temperature is always either 37.3/37.4/37.5 :(

Horoscope today :
You're ready to stop thinking about work, work and work. At the moment, since work has gone along so swimmingly, you're ready to focus on the other most important category in your life: the person you love. Instead of saying something directly to let them know how devoted you're about to become -- again -- do something subtle to let them see. That's more your style, and more what they expect.

Tiring day.. And its only the first.

Everyone's going about the first day first day, so i have to too :)
I didn't sleep in class today, despite being so tired :(
School ended at 12.30, i know its early :):)
Cause cme, chinese is taken away. Except for i think 2hours per week?
So school end very early from now on :)
Latest is 1.30, except for the fact that we have remedial like almost everyday :(
I made a promise to stay back in school and study everyday till 4 or 4.30.
I've to spend around 3hours each day for travelling, a waste of time.
Sigh.

I gave you my heart.

School tomorrow, i'm not excited at all.
I've to wake up like 5am? :(
Life's so miserable for me..
3months of waking up so damn early.
How to concentrate in class, ha ha.

Tell me why do i miss you so much.

I'm trying, real hard :(

Ok, got forced by this person above to take photo! Still must smile one -.-

She ah, super rough one eh, anyhow pull ppl and keep messing my hair! -.-

Went somerset then to bukit merah sec to watch the vb invitational matches.

Then to plaza sing, and pizza hut. Like 12ppl tgt, i bet its damn noisy.

Though we don't realise. Seriously laugh till stomach pain.

Wo cha ni ah?! HAHAHAHA.

And the look stupid or smart then 'ting tong ting tong!'

Idk when the last time i laughed till stomach pain. Hmm..

Anyway, saw peony at plaza sing. Hahaha :D:D:D

Saw her then quickly walk away :P

Went arcade, played the spot the difference game too.

Like 8ppl surround that machine and trying to see where's the difference. Haha.

It brings the memories back, sigh..

Trained to yishun and went to northpoint.

Homed around 9.30. Yeah thats right :)

School's gonna reopen tomorrow, and i've to go school on my own on monday :(:(:(

I've to leave home so early = have to wake up early too :(

[Edited]

Joys- i'm strong enough to live w/o you says:
*quick.
*close your eyes.
*then see got what number
　　　　　　　　　　　♥　　　　　　　　　　Merabel　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　LYS　　　　 says:
*Don't have number
*Only got black black
Joys- i'm strong enough to live w/o you says:
*hahahaha
*wa piang.
*retard.
　　　　　　　　　　　♥　　　　　　　　　　Merabel　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　　LYS　　　　 says:
*HAHAHAHA!

I swear its super funny!!!!!!!!!!!!

[/Edited]

Micheal Jackson died.

Woke up not long ago, am still tired :(
I got nothing to do, and nowhere to go.
Sigh. I didn't study at all, and i'm feeling guilty :/
Laziness is the cause of this.

Why do i feel jealous. I'm not supposed to feel this way.
:(

Don't patronise me.

Photos :

I don't know, sorry.

Slept around 5 in the morning and woke up at 10am.
Am feeling very tired now.
Watching bof now.

Dilemma.

I don't know what i should do now, like seriously. Sigh.
Should i give myself a chance, and others as while?
I don't know if i'm able to do it. :(
Sorry, i need some time..

I'm not gonna specify who am i referring to above.
I guess the person knows its for her. Yeah (:
Don't ask who is it for, cause i won't tell.
Except for some (idk who too).

To me, love is only between the two people involved. :)

If only tears were laughter.

Sorry for going mia for so long.
I've moved and i kinda miss my house now :(
Things hasn't been going smoothly for me, i've been trying hard to not think of some things.
And its killing me.
I've to stop thinking and hold my promise. Idw to break it again.
Smile Merabel, you can do it.

Boohoo.

Dumbass.

Anyway dont be too sensitive, it isn't for anyone.

Its for myself.

I'm gonna go take mc later, sian.

Sick sick sick.

Sick :(

I'm sooooooooo tired, its 2am alrdy.

And i'm still doing research on my dnt.

Don't know how am i gonna wake up later.

I feel like dying, seriously.

Give me some power man, sigh :(

In a way, i'm glad i am so tired so i don't have the energy to think about other things.

Though its very tough, but yeah.. :)

For those who know me long enough, first time hear me so stress eh.

Ha ha.

The promise that have to be kept.

As i've said, i didn't went for chem this morning.

I reached school at 11am, then maths till 12pm.

Did the work given by the teacher, halfway some things happened.

So tada tada.. (don't know why i suddenly use this term, haha)

Lunch was provided then went out of school for awhile (don't ask what).

Came back and play ball for awhile then went for the adam khoo workshop thingy.

Till 430 then went to play ball and then dinner with humairah and kavis.

Might be going sentosa on sunday, teehee (:

Who wanna go sentosa! Text me k! Anyone is welcome :)

I'm kinda weird today cause i say things that i don't usually say.

Might not be going online anymore.

My broadband is cancelled :(

To contact, Call/Text.

I burned my thumb and now there's blister?

I went to poke it then the 'water' came out. Then i keep poking it :(

I didn't knew i have to put plaster so the water won't 'come back'

I envy people who are genuine happy.

[Edited]

I'm feeling so stress and tired now :(

Its 12 alrdy but i'm still not asleep, sigh :(

Someone be my human alarm clock later?

Wake me up..

STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.

Btw i'm so touched :D:D:D:D

Tagged me from austraila eh :)

Love you for this :D

And, remember to come back k!

Don't abandon singapore hor !!

[/Edited]

Sigh.

I didnt went for chem eariler today but i'm going for maths.

Like now or something.

Feel guilty.

The truth that hurts.

Found out so many things. I lost faith.

Whatever it is, i'm not gonna care anymore.

Cause someone i've known less than a year,

Cant be compared to friends i've known for 4years.

Maybe somehow oneday i would.

No one will understand this :)

Full moon.

Im moving before 20th June.

So those who wanna come to my house, come before that.

We can party all week. I'm just kidding.

The moon ystd is so nice. Round round moon.

And its so bright.

I'm not worth your love at all.

I ain't good.

Make your decision.

I feel kinda good that at least someone understands how i feel.

And the person is AMANDA LEE JIA WEN! (honoured not honoured not!)

Amanda was shocked when i told her something and she said something (:

Not bad uh, you this 3years classmate :)

For this, YOU ROCK MAN!

Only if she understands how i feel. Hahaha, BKL.

Impossible.

Iloveyou.

xoxo.

Don't understand why i take those words of yours so seriously.

When i know in the end, you're gonna break it.

Why do i feel hurt over such small matter.

Why do i get so worked up.

Someone tell me.. :(

Lying on my bed for hours, thinking about stuff, letting it out & ......

I'm sort of feeling better now.

If you need someone to text when you're bored or whatsoever,

I'm here. But on a condition, ask me if you wanna know.

To be strong, i can't.

Brief summary on this week.

Not brief at all -.-

Monday the 1st :

Chinese Os, screwed up.

Night at the museum 2 at westmall with F H K G G WJ S.

Tuesday the 2nd :

School till 1.30.

"Party" at my house with sha humairah fernanda kavis grace.

Played truth or dare. Long long time since i laugh happily.

Must call ppl and say some things for dare. Still got kiss part siol :O

Shasha fernanda and me, we use the ball to aim ........

Too private alrdy, not suitable for the young :)

Played poker too and they left around 9.30? Around there.

Wednesday the 3rd :

School was supposed to end at 1.30 but was released at 1.

Went imm then to bukit batok to meet gabrielle then slacked.

Oh, we went up joyceFSS's house to use her toilet. Hahah, damn funny.

And she doesn't let me to see her dog :(

Her dog's name is called shut-up-la. Haha.

Thursday the 4th :

Dnt from 8am all th way till 530pm.

9 longggggggggg hours.

And i earned myself 6cuts on my hand and 1cut on my knee, how power -.-

Went dinner with humairah and kavis and homed.

Friday the 5th; which is today :

Dnt from 8 till 530 too, like seriously exhausted.

Plus today isnt a good day for me.

I sat on the floor supposingly to cut the lamination(?) thing,

But yet i did nothing and stare into space for very long.

Seriously don't feel like doing anyth.

Went up to the hall to play vb, and i glad that i could hide how i feel with smile and laughter.

Thats the only probably thing i'm good at. Hah.

Yknow what, i don't feel hurt reading your post, its nothing compared to what you've "given" me. Never failing to break your promises, lying t me over and over again. How could i bring myself to trust you, to trust your words. It wasn't once or twice and yknow that. Tell me, tell me how can i trust you. You know this; It takes a long period of time to build up the trust, but it only requires afew minutes to lose it. It wasn't (all), if you get what i mean. Lastly, i said i won't hate you and i never will.

The misery.

Tomorrow is the start of all sufferings.
Olevel chinese, see me in Nov taking it again.
Tuesday marks the start of camp victory.
Have to go to school everyday, how worse can it be.
All the way till 12june and then we will have 2pathetic weeks of holiday.
Ps. Not like we can enjoy and play during those 2weeks.

I'm gonna sleep early tonight, so don't be an idiot and call/text me at midnight.
Have to wake jieyi and huimin up at 6am and adeline at 6.15am.
(:

Good luck everyone.
-To those who're taking Os chinese tomorrow.

Love ; time.

I wished so much that you'd be here for me.
Giving me support for my Os.

Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so all constructed boats and left. Except for Love. Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to hold out until the last possible moment. When the island had almost sunk, Love decided to ask for help. Richness was passing by Love in a grand boat. Love said, "Richness, can you take me with you?" Richness answered, "No, I can't. There is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you." Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by in a beautiful vessel. "Vanity, please help me!"" I can't help you, Love. You are all wet and might damage my boat," Vanity answered. Sadness was close by so Love asked, "Sadness, let me go with you."" Oh . . . Love, I am so sad that I need to be by myself!" Happiness passed by Love, too, but she was so happy that she did not even hear when Love called her. Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come, Love, I will take you." It was an elder. So blessed and overjoyed, Love even forgot to ask the elder where they were going. When they arrived at dry land, the elder went her own way. Realizing how much was owed to the elder, Love asked Knowledge, another elder, "Who Helped me?" "It was Time," Knowledge answered. "Time?" asked Love. "But why did Time help me?" Knowledge smiled with deep wisdom and answered,
"Because only Time is capable of understanding how valuable Loveee is."

Tell me what to do now..

Its have been a week of all chinese and no other subjects.
I kinda enjoyed it :)
And wo de niu! See zouyi's blog for the cow's picture.

Olevel chinese day after tomorrow, abit nervous.
Afraid don't know what to write about the question.
I realised i'm deproving in my paper2 :(
Aiming for at least an A2.
Hopefully can.

Take love out of my mind please.

Is it that impossible?

Tomorrow starts the intensive chinese.
Monday to friday, whole day chinese.
No other subjects, ONLY chinese.
Gong han, si han, compo and paper2?
What the hell. Its gonna be so boring.
Plus, my chinese class is so boring :(
Unlike the other class, jealous siol.
Anyone free to entertain me haha, sms me (:
(And i mean tomorrow).

Slept at 7 in the morning,
Woke up near 1pm.
And i'm not tired, maybe i am.
I don't know, i don't know anyth right now.

Missed. ☆

Fever, headache.

Took back history chem physics chinese paper1.
Flunked all except chinese. (of course).
Only 43/70 though. B4 -.-
Hopefully paper2 would pull me up. Which i don't have any confidence for it.
Anyway, i was suprised to see my chem and physics papers.
Much much higher for this time round, but still fail though.
To think i didn't even pay any attention in class.
History was horrible, and i bet its the same for ss.

Went batok ite for friendly.
Bruises at hip and elbow. Dive and burned my hand.
Can't set properly due to my hand, hah.
And i think my wrist is starting to hurt again. :O

Scorer tomorrow, morning till evening.
15bucks per match. Alot more compared to U16 and U13, like 9dollars more.

Irritated.

Early in the morning and when i'm still in my lalaland,
Some stupid unconsiderate ppl is dk doing what, driling some holes or whatever shit.
Distubing my sleep !!
And its still so noisy now! Since like 8 till now, which is going 4?
I want to complain!!! Make me so irritated -.-

As usual, didn't went for dnt. For idk how many times alrdy.
Watched the uninvited on monday. Reached home at 12am.
School tomorrow, taking back papers? Bet i only passed chinese.

If letting go is the only solution,
Please do.

Over and over again, hurt was what that i've gotten from you.
I tried to be happy, I tried not to think about you.
But i couldn't.
Fake a smile, a laughter.
Thats probably the only thing i could do.
Tgt, we put a stop to it.
All i wished, is for you to be happy.
Take care (:

Love isn't a game.

Chem and maths paper1 tomorrow.
Didn't study at all.

LZY, take time to think about it ok.
Make the right decision, or else the both of you would suffer.

Young isn't the excuse to not know anyth.
Excuses.

Where's your promise.

Stayed at home for the whole day.
Didn't went for dnt, expected uh.
Currently watching 我的億萬麵包.

To love and not to hold.
Wo zuo bu dao..

If you cared enough..

I didn't study C.R.A.P for history today and it came out -.-
100% fail.
Chinese paper2 was rather easy i guess.
But some says its difficult.
I don't think i would score well too.

Dnt tomorrow, which kind soul can wake me up? :(
I won't be able to wake up for sure.

To not think of you, its almost impossible.

A thousand miles between us now, and it causes me to wonder why.

I'm almost done with my artefact.
Left with grinding, spraying and idk whats that called.
But folio not done yet, sad. Not even a little.
Have to chiong during camp victory.

Gonna study maths on sat after dnt.
Dnt is 9-1230pm i guess. Forgotten.

Standing on the edge of the cliff.

School today, went to cut hair.
Then library to find ppl.
And homed.

Don't tell me who to love, i love the one i love.
If i say its you, it is.

Will you be the one..

Hi i'm here to blog, but i don't know what to blog about.
Btw school tomorrow, sian.
Imm today, saw so many ppl there. Hahah.
I'm so tired and i'm going to sleep soon.
Some pig forced me to change my tenses.

Round round moon.

Went yewtee point with sha fernanda and amanda.
Went to eat and then to my house downstairs to slack.
From 4plus all the way to 8plus going 9.
Went back to yewtee point to eat our dinner, and we took almost an hour to finish eating.
Obviously we didn't finish eating -.-
The moon tonight is so nice that i keep repeating the same thing.

Fucking pain -.-

Went to school, almost couldn't hold back.
Humairah knows..
Ss today, i'd definitely flunked it. Who cares right.
Teacher wake me up to do, then i went back to sleep.
Another teacher came, she asked if i'm ok.
I looked at her and then went back to sleep. Hah.
Then chinese paper 1. Wrote crap, hah. I don't bother.
Went jurong point and then homed around 5? No idea.

I've no mood to do anyth, so don't expect much from me.
Fucking dumb thing i did ystd which cause so much pain on my hand.
Why does bad things always happens during major exams.
So coincidental. Haha -.-

:(

I'm tired :(
I feel so guilty, i didn't study at all today.
Who cares right, whatever.

Kill me.

:)

Midyear starting this thursday.
We're always lacking behind others, but that may be a good thing.
Cause we have more time to study!
:)

And zouyi is very angry. http://fly-lzy.blogspot.com/

Lyanna :
I fucking don't know who the fuck are you so i don't need your comments.
Keep your own comments to yourself, thankyou.
Welcome you back anytime but you'll not be entertain.
Grow up and get a life please.
If you think you're oh-so-perfect, then do something more worthy than spamming my blog.
Spam all you want because you're just a coward hiding behind the computer and spamming ppl.
HAHA.

Thumbs down; present; moon. <3

I'm so tired:(
I'm doing social studies essay right now, abit late i know.
Alot alot alot of things to write.
Dnt tomorrow, haven't complete my artifact:(

Pictures.

Jieyi

Siuwai & Mindy

Huda.

Yay, i'm still taller than jieyi even though she wear heels! Cheaterbug!

Siuwai and Zhihui

Lol. Zouyi's bag. Siuwai wanted to take photo with me cause i carrying that bag!!

Eh i tiptoe same height as you hor huimin! Don't think you wear heels then very tall!

Taken by huimin! Keep say i act cute! I talk also kena say :(

Hahah you take picture of me, i take picture of you! :)